Bruises and Excuses
by A Faint Memory Once Recalled
Summary: After their foster parents beat and neglect them for years, two Italian brothers cope in different ways. Feliciano cuts. Lovino takes it out on everyone else in remarks and punches. But after Lovino gets expelled, the two enroll in Hetalia High School. It seems just like another year of hell, at least until a German and Spaniard start coming too close to their secret for comfort…
1. Prologue

In the beginning, there's fear. A true fear for a life, not one that someone who has never had that kind of experience would understand.

This isn't a story born of bravery, intelligence, or someone at the right place at the right time. It was conceived of anger and resentment, violence and screams. Flinching and pleads for mercy.

But not of a war. At least, not one between countries or races. However, it's the worst kind, one that should never occur.

The kind between parent and child.

This story happened because of two frightened kids and two people who refused to give up on them.

It all starts and ends with two brothers, Feliciano and Lovino Vargas.

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**Yeah, I know it's short and not very well written, but I've wanted to write this for a while ^^;**

**I was upset because I couldn't find a story with this kind of plot with good grammar, characterization, and plot. I decided to try my hand and see if I can try to fulfill all three requirements~**

**If you have any suggestions or requests for this story, don't be afraid to review or PM me with them! I love what you guys think and any ideas you guys get; it makes the story much more interesting!**

**~Julia**


	2. Prisoner

**Warnings for this chapter: Implied self harm and suggested child abuse.**

* * *

For the millionth time, the knife trembled in his hands. He stared down at his arm, enchanted at the colorful sight. It reminded him of a painting, in a macabre way. From lack of sunlight, his skin was pale like a canvas. The 'paint' was the extensive wounds covering nearly every inch. The red and pink was the straight, crisscrossing marks, the blue, green and yellow the bruises.

"Feliciano! Hurry up! We're going to be fucking late!" A voice snapped with a light bang on the bathroom door, effectively pulling the male out of his temporary trance. He bit his lip, suddenly shoving the sharp object into his worn out bag and quickly pulling down his sleeve over his arm.

"Ve, sorry fratello~ I'll be out in a minute!" he chirped back cheerfully. He carefully swung his backpack over his shoulder (avoiding his aching back as much as possible) as he unlocked and exited out the door. At the sight of his brother, Lovino scoffed.

"Let's go," he mumbled, eyes narrowed in annoyance as he turned towards the front door. Feliciano just grinned goofily at his brother's back as he followed close behind. On their way out, the younger glanced up at the clock on the wall. His face scrunched up in a confused look at the hour clock pointing to six.

"Aren't we leaving a bit early, Lovino?" he asked innocently.

"If you haven't forgot, we have to fucking walk the whole way, and do you really want those bastards to wake up before we leave?!" His lips were pressed tightly together as he turned back his head to look at his twin.

Feliciano paled and frantically shook his head. He'd just been punished yesterday night, and his back burned even more so than before just thinking about them. From the slight tinge of guilt in Lovino's eyes, Feliciano guessed that his brother was remembering as well.

"Tch, let's just get the hell out of here before the alcohol wears off." Both shivered at that as they left; their so called 'guardians' got hangovers often, and they always resulted in more beatings than if they were sober.

The walk down the sidewalk would have been beautiful if either male had been paying much attention. It was still a bit dark out, but the concrete was illuminated by a slowly rising sun. The sunset was beautiful, colors spreading over the clouds like spilled water.

Feliciano was too wrapped up in his thoughts or notice, or might have wanted to paint it.

Would there be bullies here like at the last school, he wondered nervously. The little Italian didn't think he could handle any more of their relentless teasing or being painfully shoved into a locker, especially since-

"Feliciano! Feli!" Once again, a voice brought him back to reality.

"Ve?" was his intelligent response.

"I've been calling your name for the last five minutes, _idiota_!" he scolded. "We're almost there, so...just...be careful. And if anyone gives you shit, come to me. Everyone will know not to fuck with my little brother." His voice had softened a bit by the end, but the other wouldn't dare comment.

"Okay, fratello~" he replied with a swift nod, even though his brother was still facing forward.

As his brother predicted, they spotted the school within five minutes. They both lingered at the front door, even though it was open and a few students were beginning to filter in.

Lovino met Feliciano's eyes, conveying a simple question. _Ready?_

With his hands clenched so tightly around his bag straps that they were white, he took a deep breath and nodded.

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**Man, the feedback I've already had is amazing, you guys, especially with such a short prologue! Seriously. I love you all. Anyway, I can't promise that my chapters will be long (I'm terrible at that ^^;), but I can vow that I'll post new chapters as often as I can! I'm not sure how long this fanfiction will be, but I'm guessing around 20-25 chapters, with maybe a short sequel.**

**Also, sorry for ending it there, but I'm tired and I have school tomorrow *groan***

**RoxanneTheGreat: Great, that'll make this story a whole lot easier for me~**

**Suta-tan: Haha, I'll work on being more clear XD I meant that those are the two people the beginning and end have in common, if that makes sense. Yeah, and I've never really been that good at quantity, but I suppose if you like it then it's fine for now~**

**Spamano4ever: Depends on how easy it is for you to cry~**

**nerdyfanchick: Oh my goodness, I blushed a little there because I actually didn't really like it, so it's nice to hear feedback like that. Thanks a lot~**

**~Julia**


	3. The First Day

Lovino let out a quiet curse in Italian as he compared the schedules in his hands. "We only have fucking lunch together! Hell, our other classrooms are so far apart…Not even our lockers are close! I knew we should have taken the same classes!"

"And I told you that you should take what you want to take and not what I want to take! It's fine, fratello," Feliciano returned with a knowing smile. "_I'm_ fine."

The elder hesitated. "Are you sure?" The smaller Italian confirmed with a small nod. Lovino sighed, giving in. "All right, but if anything goes wrong, I swear to fucking god-"

"-you'll switch your classes," the other finished abruptly. "I got it, Lovino. See you at lunch!" With closed fists, Lovino huffed, shoved one of the papers into his brother's hands, and turned on his heel. A moment later, Feliciano was walking in the opposite direction, the smile fading off his face.

No, he told himself. Smile or everything will come crashing down. Taking a deep breath, the mask came back up, a seemingly carefree grin coming over his features. I can do this he repeated over and over like a mantra in his mind.

After a few minutes of maneuvering around other highschoolers, he finally arrived at his locker, 329. He glanced down at the scribbled numbers on the crumpled paper in his hand. His fingers brushed the lock, his slender appendages quickly moving from number to number until there was a small click and the metal door snapped open.

He slipped the bag off his shoulders. Using one hand to hold the rough strap, he shoved the other in his bag. He carefully placed each supply in the locker, some of them somewhat new, others obviously anything but. Most of it, the latter.

At the very bottom was a familiar glinting object that caught his eye. Looking side to side, he reached his hand in and grabbed the hilt. Even just holding it in his palm was comforting. Discreetly, he slipped the knife into his pocket.

The effect was instantaneous.

Immediately, his tense shoulders relaxed. It was like a weight had been taken off of them. Just the thought that he had it if he needed it-if he felt the sudden, unfightable urge-was the reason he felt like he could breathe freely again.

Finally, he looked down at the schedule in his hands. _Algebra 2. Art. English 10. Foods 1. Gym. Biology. Band._

He grimaced at the thought of gym. Not only would it be difficult hiding his bruises and cuts, changing would be nearly impossible. Plus, activity often opened his wounds, as did balls in games like dodgeball. He would have to be careful, especially on days like this when he'd barely gotten his back to stop bleeding.

Grabbing everything he needed for his first three classes, he began to make his way to Algebra 2, humming a simple. It definitely wasn't his favorite class, but he could manage.

After a little bit of trial and error, he arrived at his classroom. Resisting the urge to keep his head down, he claimed the only free seat left- the one next to a scowling blonde.

He scanned the faces of his classmates, some of which were intimidating, especially the person he was sitting next to.

Dread started to take hold, and already, Feliciano knew this was going to be a _long_ school year.

* * *

**Hello, everyone! Sorry for the delay, these last couple days have been hell in terms of free time. Oh well… But really, wow, the reviews in this story have really skyrocketed! You guys are amazing! Also, if anyone would like to help me with some of the characters, that would be great. I'm not too good at keeping certain characters IC, especially Spain **

**I don't really want to ruin this story with something that could easy be fixed with some help. If you'd like to assist me, just PM me~! Don't worry if you're not good at grammar or anything, because I'll fix it before I post. All I need is some help with what they say and their reactions. You'll be credited of course~**

**Okay, one more thing. GerIta and SpaMano are the main pairings, but of course they won't be the only couples, so requests for pairings are open~ You don't have to PM me for this (just stick it in a review :D), but feel free if you want.**

**Spamano4ever: Oh man, you're just gonna despise them later…**

**nerdyfanchick: Thank you ^^ A lot of times in other fanfictions, I think authors often make him more mean than he actually is. He's just...grumpy, is all. Also, he would definitely be close to Feli, maybe even more so than in the show, just because all they've ever really had is each other.**

**Baylee1100: Haha, I'm glad you're so excited for new chapters :)**

**TheWeaverofWorlds: Thanks! It's my goal that you can see it in your mind, and the knowledge that I've achieved that is fantastic news~ And I always plan on updating as long as I have the muse for it, and it's going quite strong at the moment!**

**ChaosKnight005: Great~**

**Guest: Sorry ^^; I'm not too good at length. If I tried to make it long, it would take forever to get out.**

**WickedInk: Oh thank you, I wanted to do a beginning that hooked the reader but wasn't a cliche. I'm glad you like it so far~**

**EmiCyanSayMii: Thanks~ I'm happy you enjoyed it!**

**how to train your demon: Great! I hope you continue to like it as time goes on~**

**Until next time, ciao!**

**~Julia**


	4. Bad Day

Lovino was pissed off, which wasn't an uncommon occurrence, but it still meant something.

Like most times, it was because of his little brother Feliciano. Now, don't get him wrong, his fratello honestly is the light of his world, but the fact that so many people liked hearing him scream worried him immensely.

He remembered when his brother had been liked, the favorite, even. But that was a long time ago, before their bastard of a grandfather had suddenly passed with no warning. No one had been willing to take the brothers in; foster care was the only choice, and it all went to hell from there.

In a way, Feliciano still was the favorite, but not the kind anyone ever wanted to be. Lovino had heard way too much screaming in his lifetime, but less than a fourth was his own.

It was mostly his brother's cries that filled his mind.

Anyway, Lovino wasn't happy. He really was the angriest he'd been in a while. Usually, he would look after his brother in the hallways and classrooms, making sure no one picked on or was remotely mean to him because, without a doubt, both of them got enough of that at home. It didn't help that the bullies were drawn to the petite Italian.

But this school was rather big, not the smaller ones the brothers were used to, and protecting Feliciano just wasn't possible when they had such different schedules. It was the worst kind of luck. If Lovino didn't know better, he would swear the teachers did that on purpose just to spite them. Either way, he was going to make their life half as bad as his just for that.

Admittedly, this school was a lot cleaner and overall better, but Lovino still didn't think he had deserved to get kicked out of their last school. Someone blew up a toilet and suddenly it's all his fault. Why the hell would he blow up a toilet?! But it wasn't like he could defend himself. He was quite the troublemaker; why would anyone believe him?

Of course, Feli got the beating for that, just yesterday. Their foster parents had quickly learned that Lovino didn't give half a shit if he was hit, but was guilty as hell when his brother got the bruises. They had used that to their advantage countless times. The mere thought of his brotehr in pain was often enough to keep Lovino in line,

However, not only the beating the day before bothered him. There was something… off about Feliciano. Very off. But no matter how much interrogation Lovino put his brother through, the younger still wouldn't fess up. He would find out eventually, but eventually wasn't coming fast enough.

If Lovino had been in a cartoon, there would certainly have been steam coming out of his ears as he roughly unlocked the locker in front of him. Nearly pulling the door off it's hinges, he angrily shoved his books on the shelf.

The day had barely begun, and he just wanted it to end. This bad mood was definitely not going to insure a good impression on his new classmates, but hell if Lovino cared. If he ever learned something from his shitty excuse for a life, it was that he couldn't ever trust anyone else besides his brother.

Chemistry and Gym were his first two classes, and the thought of both made his frustration spike even more. This was not his day, apparently. He swung his gym bag over his shoulder, and nearly fell over with the weight of his chemistry book.

"Do they want me to break my back?!" he exclaimed loudly, beginning to mutter foul language in both English and Italian under his breath.

The spew of curses didn't even stop when he arrived at his first period.

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**Heh, heh… Sorry it's so late and short. I was having asthma issues and other stuff... Yeah, but here's Lovino. Aw, Lovi's having a bad day. It's only going to get worse from here, poor guy… But then it's going to get better! So just hang in there!**

**Spamano4ever: Trust me, I want to cuddle them as well And yes, you can request pairings~ Go ahead~**

**Baylee1100: Thank you ^^**

**WickedInk: Thanks~ They really do have a close sibling relationship, and I love to explore that~**

**kikigirl4321: Thank you! I'll definitely consider those pairings~**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing!**

**~Julia**


	5. Welcome to Hell

"-and he was so nice, fratello! He helped me with my math and-"

Lovino frowned, shoving his hands into his pockets as he mentally began to drone out his brother. He swallowed thickly, guilt once again coming over him in a wave. Feliciano always rambled when he was nervous, especially on the walk home.

"That sounds great," he interrupted, glancing back at the younger.

"Yeah!" Feliciano agreed with a bright smile. "Did you meet anyone, Lovino?"

At this, he paused in his stride before walking again. "..No," he replied simply. "No one." Green eyes and kind features came to mind before Lovino pushed them out of his thoughts. "Did anyone try to fuck with you today?"

Feliciano's grin faltered before coming back full force. "N-no, Fratello."

Damn it. He'd hoped this wouldn't have happened. But perhaps that was all it was. Hope. "Don't lie."

This time, his smile truly fell. "Yeah... but it's not too bad, I promise!"

Anger rose up before he reluctantly suppressed it. "If they try again, you better tell me. I'll kick all their damned asses," he hissed, his eyes glinting.

Feliciano simply nodded, his hazel eyes darting down to the sidewalk as an awkward silence came over the two.

The rest of the walk was silent, and both felt dread come over them when they finally arrived at the beaten down house. The paint was peeling. The grass was overgrown to the point of no return and the sheer number of weeds was astounding.

The brothers stood there awkwardly for a moment, before Lovino hesitantly approached the door. "Feliciano, get behind me," he ordered quietly.

"But Lovi-" the younger Italian began, obviously worried.

"They'll only hurt you. Get. Behind. Me." It was spoken with such finality, Feliciano didn't dare argue.

His hand closed around the doorknob, and, after a moment of gathering his courage, he pushed it open.

They were greeted with the overwhelming stench of alcohol. Both of them immediately covered their noses.

"Are you little shits home yet?!" A voice demanded from the kitchen. "You're fucking late, you useless pieces of shit!"

Lovino's fist clenched. _Here we go._

**Oh, you guys are amazing! Only four chapters and already thirty five reviews! You guys really are the best, even when I'm not so good at updating ^^; Sorry for the wait, but I promise I'll try to update again really soon because of this super short chapter. I just have been really busy as of late, if that's any excuse.**

** .2013: Always~**

**Blue Feather Star: Thank you.**

**kikigirl4321: I'm glad!**

**Baylee1100: Of course. Also, sorry XD I tried writing it but nothing worked.**

**Spamano4ever: That's the point XD And sure, I'll try~**

**Kuronekohimesama: Thank you, and yeah, it's all going to unfold soon~**

**valkyrievampire888: As do I… And yes, maybe I'll put in those pairings~**

**Guest1: Thanks! Yeah, I'm sorry about the short chapters, but I barely make them as long as they already are ^^;**

**Guest2: Same as above ^**

**TheWeaverofWorlds: I almost did when I was writing it, honestly.**

**Sakurai160: Me as well~**

**ThatOneGingerKid: Of course he does~!**


	6. Arms of an Angel

Feliciano let out another pained cry as his head was brutally slammed against the wall, tears streaming down his face to mix with the blood.

"God, you're so fucking annoying. Why wouldn't you stop crying, you worthless piece of shit?! Fuck, be a man, not some weak five year old fucking girl," he snarled, his eyes narrowing

A punch to the eye. A kick to the ribs. More than one kick. This went on for what seemed like an eternity before it finally ended with a foot on the poor teen's back, slamming him onto the floor and putting him in utter agony.

The blonde haired man-the man who was supposed to be his foster father, but instead his tormenter-looked down on the the Italian with disgust, his dark brown eyes not showing an ounce of regret. Only undilated hate.

"Oh, look at you," he hissed. "So pathetic. This is why no one will ever give a single shit about you. So just go and fucking disappear already." His footsteps receded, and before long faded into nothing

"You better fuckin' got 'em," a slurred voice demanded as Lovino walked in.

He practically threw the cigarettes on the man's lap before his clenched fists returned to his side. Good. He was full out drunk, which meant Lovino could actually speak his mind without getting his brother hurt because of it.

"That's what you fucking wanted. Now where is my brother?!"

"Like I fucking care," he replied with a scoff.

His worry only growing, the brunette quickly walked off in search of Feliciano. It only took a minute or two to find him, but to the Italian, it felt like an eternity.

At the sight of his twin, Lovino's eyes widened. "God…" he murmured, not wasting any time getting over to his brother. He swung the younger's arm over his shoulders and helped him to the twins' shared room to treat him.

This had obviously been the worst beating in a while. Not wanting to make himself panic, Lovino started with his face. His eye was black and swollen, and that caused the elder of the two to curse under his breath. That would be difficult to hide. There was also a long scratch on his forehead as well, which would be hid under hair quite easily, but head wounds always bleed for a while.

He then moved down to his chest and abdomen, carefully removing the bloody fabric as gently as he could. However, that proved almost impossible as the fabric fibers had stuck in Feliciano's wounds.

As soon as it was off, Lovino's eyes widened and he took in a sharp intake of breath. "That...That fucking bastard."

His back was the worst. To say it had been practically shredded would almost be an understatement. There were countless wounds on his back, from the wrong end of a belt. Nearly every slash had broken his pale skin, and the tint of green was a bad sign. Some in the middle had recently been reopened. Lovino could only guess, but he suspected it had been by a foot.

He carefully cleaned each one, a fresh wave of guilt coming over him each time Feliciano cried out. He noticed suspicious white bandages on his brother's arms, but he didn't have an excuse to check since nothing was bleeding through and they only had a limited supply of bandages. On Feliciano's back alone he would probably use most of them.

His legs and lower have mostly had bruises, so that went over quickly. After putting Feliciano in bed, Lovino washed off the blood and returned to his brother's side.

"Goddamn, I'm so sorry, Feli," he muttered, lying next to his brother.

Why couldn't the bastards at least do this on the weekend?! He wanted to scream. For the rest of the week, his brother would be in so much pain without a day of recuperation until the Saturday.

Someday, I'm going to get us out of here, he thought. I promise, Feli.

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**Spamano4ever: Yeah,I can only imagine how angry you are after reading this chapter…**

**taurus2001: Haha, I know I shouldn't be, but I'm very flattered ^^ It's nice to know my writing can inspire feelings. Alright, another vote for FrUk then~**

**Kuronekohimesama: Wow, you're the first person to thank me for updating ^^; Usually it's 'update soon!' so that's nice of you~**

**DolmaafAmlod: Thank you, and I'm glad~**

**DaIvanbraginski: Haha, sorry, but I'm going to have to.**

**Starfire67: Yeah, it's actually going to be a little while until it all clicks in Ludwig and Antonio actually find out, but you can only imagine what will happen when they do find out~**

**The Magnetic Witch : I do as well ^^ And yeah, they aren't the nicest people...They pretty much only have Lovino and Feliciano because they get money from it.**

**Baylee1100: Okay~**

**Guest: I shall~**

**WickedInk: Man, that would be my worst fear; dying without you guys knowing what happened to me. Also, thank you~**


	7. Luka

Ludwig wasn't sure what to think of the new student.

From when he was small, he was always about order and neatness, quiet and planning. Feliciano obviously was not. He was chaos and spontaneousness; his exact opposite in every way. Just from one class period, that was easy to tell. But there was something...off about him that bothered him immensely. But either way, Ludwig couldn't help but to keep gravitating towards him, and vice versa.

After Algebra was over, he had Feliciano in three other classes, and every time he found himself near, if not right next to, him. Even when he got home, the boy barely left his mind, and he had trouble sleeping that night. Although he wouldn't admit it to himself, the blonde eagerly awaited the next morning.

This worried him. How in the world had the little Italian wormed his way into his heart so quickly? He was almost… a friend. His face flushed at the thought. The closest person he'd ever had as a friend was Kiku Honda down the street; they occasionally were a group of two when the teacher required them to have partners, and Kiku was one of the people Ludwig could tolerate for an extended period of time.

At least, until now.

When Tuesday morning had arrived, he got up even earlier than he usually did, made his bed, took a shower, got Gilbert up, ate a healthy breakfast, and finally rushed out the door five minutes early.

The bus ride seemed to take longer than it usually did, especially because Gilbert had stayed up late (again).

"Ugh, this bus is not fit for my awesomeness! It smells like sweat and failure."

"Then get your licence!"

After an agonizing fifteen minutes that Ludwig swore was much, much longer, the school bus finally pulled in. The German wasted no time in grabbing his backpack and escaping that hell. His first class came faster, and for a moment he thought the brunette wasn't gonna show.

A couple seconds after the bell rang, Feliciano walked in, his head down. Even if he'd walked in like he normally did, Ludwig would still see the slightest of winces every time he moved.

The teacher turned up his nose. "Mr. Vargas? You mind explaining why you're late." The teen's head snapped up, revealing a black eye and dark circles under both.

"Sorry, sir! I woke up late!"

"The next time you are tardy, it will be a detention, now sit."

"Are you alright?" he asked, concerned as his wince wasn't so subtle when he sat.

"Fine," he whispered back, his voice raspy and rough. This only deepened Ludwig's worry.

"What happened to your eye?" he questioned, trying to sound as kind as he could.

"Oh that? I was playing baseball with Lovino and he accidentally hit it into my eye. Funny, huh?"

That sounded too nervous to be the truth, and the blonde's pencil nearly snapped in his tight grip before he released just in time. But, judging the fierce glare aimed his way by the Algebra teacher, now was not the time to question it. He nodded in acceptance before turning to the work before him.

Ludwig was trying his best to ignore the bad feeling the conversation had left in his chest.

* * *

**Wow, fifty reviews! You guys really motivate me! I'll definitely write something special when the 100th review happens. In other news, I put up a poll for pairings on my profile page; go check it out and vote!**

**Starfire67: It's funny you should mention that… That actually bothered me a lot as well. It's cute seeing Lovi being the protective big brother and all, but it just got kind of old after a while. And honestly… Italy/Feliciano is one of my favorite characters, and I love seeing angst with them getting hurt. Yes, I'm a terrible person, I know. Also, Lovino loves his brother a lot, but sometimes he has the wrong way of showing it. They would tell, but they're afraid of being separated, or being put in an even worse home than before. Yeah, system's not too fun.**

**Spamano4ever: They'll get their dues.**

**Dalvanbragiski: He'll get there eventually.**

**Aphrodi: Thank you for this constructive criticism. I really appreciate it. I will keep all that in mind, and really try to work on that. Once again, thanks for the help!**

**Katie-Kat1129: Yes, that's always fun~**

**WickedInk: Exactly how I feel! And trust me, Ludwig and Antonio will not be happy.**

**Baylee100: Always~**

**too lazy to log in: pfft XD Nice~ Thank you~**

**kikigirl4321: I'll try!**

**TaliaLion234: Once again, I'll try.**

**Sakurai160: They get love eventually~**


	8. Carry On My Wayward Son

Lovino's hands clenched as he desperately tried to pay attention to the English lesson. However, his worry was gnawing a hole in his stomach, and he was finding it very difficult.

That too cheerful idiot was sitting in front of him, and he was too damn tall. The shorter Italian could barely see the whiteboard. Years of malnutrition had taken it's toll (though not so much on him as his brother) and if he'd gotten proper food, he would at least be two or three inches taller than he was currently.

However, the punishments were getting worse for the slightest of offences, and Lovino was seriously starting to worry that they might not actually live that long. It was becoming harder and harder for them to hide the bruises and welts and cuts on poor Feliciano...Not that anyone noticed (no one ever did) and it would stay that way until they were both eighteen and could leave the hell they were forced to live in for good. Then they wouldn't ever be separated.

Those three short years seemed like an eternity away, especially with the fear of an even worse beating hanging over them like a dark, swollen rain cloud. They knew it was going to happen eventually, but it was like walking on eggshells. Neither ever knew when it would be.

The class must have ended, because everyone began talking and that strange albino had snuck up and glomped that poor blonde kid with the glasses and teddy bear again, scaring (from Lovino's point of view of course) the living shit out of him. Of course the taller just laughed and snuggled closer to the blushing male.

The brunette averted his eyes and swallowed thickly, suddenly feeling a tinge of jealousy. No, it wasn't like he even remotely liked either one of them (especially that albino) but he would really give anything to feel strong arms around him, making him feel safe.

"What the hel-" He suddenly yelped as that stupid Spaniard glomped him without warning. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he demanded with a huff and a glare.

"Making you feel better!" Antonio replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Lovino's eyes could see the worried tint in the other's eyes and scowled. He didn't need this shit, not today.

"Well, all it's doing is pissing me off!" he snapped in return. Antonio continued speaking in that insufferable, confident way of his, and the shorter replied in insults and rolled eyes.

However, he really couldn't deny the feeling of pleasant warmth growing in his chest.

* * *

Feliciano quickly threw open the bathroom door, securing it as fast as he could and leaning back the the seat. After a rushed check, he determined he was alone, and his desperate hand found the hilt of the knife in his pocket.

_You're pathetic..._

However, this time the familiar weight in his palm was not enough to make him feel everything was okay in the world. Switching positions so he was on his knees and his arm hung over the bowl of the toilet, he began.

Each slice brought a little more relief, and he greedily sucked up the pain because it just felt so good. The red marks on his arm crossed many times, and the emotional pain was so intense, he wasn't satisfied until his entire forearm was covered in cuts and crimson, and he was beginning to feel a bit lightheaded. And that was barely enough. But he knew better than to continue.

For a moment, he just glanced at the beautiful scenery once again, before wiping the remaining blood off with toilet paper and wrapping new bandages without even looking.

As he walked out, he paused at the sinks, and the urge to slam his wrist against the hard stone was almost unbearable. But another person began to stroll in, so the Italian merely pulled down his sleeves and washed his red hands. It was off in a matter of seconds, just gone when the person entered.

It turned out to be a very worried Ludwig, who had probably been wondering why he left so abruptly. His questioning had been the thing to set him off, not that he knew. If Feliciano couldn't hide one beating from him, then how was he going to hide the others for the remainder of the year? He was going to have to be more careful. Much more.

"You alright? You've been in here awhile.." he asked slowly, his blue eyes laced with concern.

"I'm fine now!" Feliciano replied with a grin.

_We both know that's a lie._

**Hey you guys! Hope you liked the chapter! You'll get to see their foster mom next chapter, and I think she'll be different than what you expect. Also, as you can see, I'm also beginning to incorporate other pairings in, and vote on the poll on my page because next Tuesday they'll be official!**

**Also, you'll get to see more Lovino and Antonio in the next few chapters, and a lot near the end. Sorry that you only saw a screenshot here!**

**I have gotten a beta-reader, as well! However, she did not beta read this chapter because I got impatient for her to get on and I felt really bad about waiting so long to get this out.**

**Baylee1100: Yeah, unluckily for him, it's gonna get worse….**

**Spamano4ever: He will soon~**

**Starfire67: They will definitely be on the lookout now, so they may notice something they haven't before *hint hint***

**RoxanneTheGreat: I'll add that to the poll then~**

**Fred and George Weasley Twins: I will try!**

**TaliaLion234: Wow, you're the first person to be okay with that. (Also, sorry I broke my promise, but I'll explain more in a PM)**

**taurus2001: Sorry man, I hate to give out spoilers. I'll give out hints though! It won't be long until he finds out~ (In other words, I have no idea…)**

**WickedInk: Ha, this might not have satisfied you, but they'll be more (which I will be talking to you about~)**

** .2013: Thank you!**

**DaIvanbraginski Yup, he doesn't get a break.**

**TheWeaverofWorlds: He will, but he only has one piece of the puzzle right now! After he at least has most of the pieces, he shall do something about it~**

**roxywolfie27: Thank you! And one review really tells me a lot, so thanks!**

**Reagan: Thank you, and I always try!**


	9. Lie

On the walk home, Lovino and Feliciano both paled considerably as they saw the car parked neatly in the driveway.

Perhaps the only thing worse than their foster father at home was both their foster parents. Their foster father may have been an abusive drunk, but their foster mother was completely sober and still despised the sight of them. In a way, she was even worse.

As soon as they walked in, a hand shot out, grabbing onto the youngest of the two and pulling him towards herself.

"Look at the state of this one, Jonah!" Her long fingernails dug into Feliciano's cheeks as she glared down coldly at him, then at her husband. "You're going to get us arrested, then where will your precious beer be?"

Their foster father glared right back with just as much force. "It doesn't fucking matter, Marie. No one gives a shit about them. Not that anyone would ever believe them anyway," he slurred in reply.

She paused at this, tucking her auburn hair behind her ears with her free hand. With a huff she released the brunette, and he barely kept himself from falling over. Luckily, Lovino knew better than to speak, but his fists were clenched tightly at his sides. He wanted nothing more than to protect his brother, but any attempts would be meant with extreme force, and he would spare Feliciano more pain by not acting. That didn't mean that he was okay with that, however.

It wasn't easy seeing his little brother receive so much hate.

"That may be true, but we still need to be careful," she hissed. "We don't want social services to fucking visit again." She then walked towards Lovino, grabbing his shirt and meeting his steely gaze with narrow eyes. He didn't even flinch. "I know the short one won't tell," she began, "But if you even fuckin' hint that something's wrong, the other one will have _an unfortunate accident_."

The hinted threat wasn't lost on the brunette. Lovino's hands were clenched so hard it actually drew blood, because if anyone should know what she meant it was him. She wasn't fibbing either. That woman was the one who caused his brother to bear his beatings instead of him, the one who picked out the most dependent children she could find to foster for the money,the one that caused them the most pain..

"Now make yourself scarce before I decide to inflict his punishment early!"

Without missing a beat, Lovino grabbed his brother's arm (ignoring his squeak of pain) and dragged him up to their shared room. The downstairs argument was easy to tune out, and out of the corner of his eye, the elder of the two noticed bandages.

"What're those from?" he asked, his voice admittedly more demanding than questioning.

"T-The belt hit my arms. I took care of them, don't worry!" he replied quickly, his voice going up a notch.

Despite the fact that Lovino still felt uneasy about Feliciano's answer, the explanation was believable enough, and he accepted it with a nod and advice. "Don't let them get infected."

Feliciano just smiled and agreed to do so.

"We should change your bandages." Lovino brought out the first aid kit he'd always hid, and cursed loudly.

"What's wrong, Fratello?"

"Shit, we're out of bandages! Fuck, I didn't even notice. You'll live until I can get some, right?" His voice was getting steadily more desperate.

"Si, I bet they won't get too bad." They were suddenly interrupted by a voice.

"Lovino! Come down here, you little shit!" Feliciano flinched, his now worried eyes shifting to his brother.

"It's fucking fine. Those bastards probably just want some more beer or something. Stay here." Lovino's language worsened with his mood, and worry was now nearly overwhelming him. They usually only made him go on errands when they wanted to thoroughly punish Feliciano and didn't want him to get too loud. Last time he'd been there when Feli was beaten so badly he couldn't move for three days, the cops had actually been called.

They certainly didn't want that to happen again.


	10. Lonely Ghosts

On the walk home from school the next day, Lovino was progressively getting more and more worried. His brother was pale and shivering, and from his stiff walk he could tell Feliciano was in a great deal of pain. His brother had learnt well to walk normally when he was hurting, so the fact that it was obvious was not a good sign. When they'd finally arrived at their 'home', they silently maneuvered around the seemly endless amounts of beer bottles and the drunk passed out on the couch .

As soon as they were in their room, Lovino reached out and placed the back of his hand on his brother's forehead. His frown deepened as he felt burning skin beneath his fingers. Cursing under his breath, he sat his brother down on the bed.

"I'm sorry Feli," he apologized softly, brushing Feliciano's brunette hair out of his eyes. "We're out of bandages. I promise I'll get some tomorrow." Oh no, there was no way he was leaving his brother in this state, not when that bastard could wake up at any second and make everything worse. But, his brother was quite out of it at this point (or would be very soon) and it was likely he couldn't even go to school tomorrow.

"It's okay, fratello," his voice was strained and scratchy, and his fists clenched as he shoved down the sudden anger at his foster 'father'.

"No, it's not," he corrected in the same soft tone. "You're sick now because of it. You're still wearing the bandages from last night and we both know that'sfucking not healthy-"

"It's not your fault!" he protested as loudly as he could under the circumstances. "It's not... It's his fault." Lovino knew too well who 'he' was.

For the longest time, they just were silent. Until Feliciano spoke. "Do you think if someone else took us, we'd be happier?" His voice was so innocent, and childlike. Broken.

Lovino didn't reply, but merely swallowed thickly. He's just out of it, that's all, he reminded himself. "Let's get you in the shower," he ordered quietly. Not only would the cool water bring down Feliciano's fever, but it would clean his wounds as well. It would have been better if they had some type of alcohol (well, technically they did, but they knew better than to touch that), but cleaning them was better than leaving them dirty. It would hurt, but Lovino would give his brother some pain medication afterwards.

The taller male assisted the shorter to the bathroom and then the tub. They hadn't done this in quite a while, but right now Lovino didn't trust the younger not to drown himself, not when his mind was muddled with sickness and pain. Besides, Feliciano never had a problem with being nude in front of his brother. Or at least, he used to. He hadn't done that in a while either.

Shoving the thoughts away for now, Lovino carefully pulled the shirt off his brother. But, no matter how slowly and how cautious he was, he knew that taking off the clothing would hurt. And this time, Feliciano was awake. More importantly, he would remember the pain… or not. His brother wasn't exactly in his right mind at this point.

The small hiss his brother let out while he was removing it felt like his heart was being stabbed, but he shook it off. "Now that pants, okay?" he soothed.

"M'Kay," his brother replied, almost dreamily.

That was significantly easier, but now came the hardest part. The bandages. "Here we go," he sighed under his breath. It was more encouragement for himself than informing Feliciano. Which one should I remove first? he asked himself. The bandages around his arms intrigued him, but his back needed more attention.

Back. The more quickly he did this, the less painful it would be, so he skillfully peeled the stained coverings off swiftly, not pausing when his brother let out a pained hiss. He then grabbed a stool, and not even bothering to take off his clothes, sat on it in the shower and put his brother over his knees for better access of the teen's back. When he realized just much more badly it looked than yesterday, his stomach dropped and he took in a sharp intake of breath.

The tint of green was no longer than just a tint, and the tiny portion of skin that wasn't shredded

had become red and inflamed. The new lashes had only worsened his previous condition. Lovino cursed again. Those would have to be cleaned thoroughly once again; there was no way he was allowing this infection to get worse.

Well, he couldn't very well give his brother a shower with the bandages around his wrists, so those came off as quickly as possible as well.

Lovino honestly wasn't prepared for what was underneath. Luckily, they weren't infected like the poor Italian's back, but wasn't what he was focusing on at this point. He looked down wide eyes at the intersecting marks, some faded and some not. Suddenly, it all clicked together in his mind. "I knew he lied...Feliciano, what the hell?!" he exclaimed in a loud whisper, glancing over at the said person.

But, unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately) he knew the younger of the two wasn't lucid at the time, and any questioning would be pointless.

"God, you better have a good explanation." With that, he reached over and turned on the water before going up and turning the shower on it's gentlest setting and grabbing a clean washcloth. After that, he fell into a rhythm, washing out the infected wounds, cleaning the blood off the cloth, wringing it out, and repeat. After he was done with that, he cleaned his brother's arms for good measure.

"There we go, Feli," he mumbled, helping Feliciano up and snatching a towel. Though he himself was dripping wet and his drenched clothes were clinging to him, his brother was the priority, and he dried off the other the best he could.

This was the part where he would usually use bandages, but for right now it would just be best to use a sterile cloth. They had been without proper ones before, but usually they had plenty of the frequently used medical tool. But this time, Lovino really hadn't been expecting Feliciano to receive such a vicious beating, and then one even more so just a day after.

"God, I'm so sorry…" he whispered as he wrapped the wounds best he could and out his brother to bed. "I'm so sorry, Feliciano…."

* * *

**Double chapter today~ **

**Well, this chapter marks the beginning of the end of the story. It'll probably be just a few more chapters and then an epilogue to wrap things up. I'm really excited; this is the first story that I've actually finished! I just want to take the time to tell you guys how much I've appreciated your support throughout this story, and all the people who've assisted me with writing it.**

**Spamano4ever: ^^;**

**Baylee1100: He really has no choice.**

**Fred and George Weasley Twins: Hope this is early enough!**

**Akayuki Sawada: Yeah, they definitely need some help, and soon.**

**stranger379: You pretty much just summarized all the reviews I've gotten.**


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